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Monday, April 27, 2009

Cooper.

I was planning to post my review of Paper Towns tomorrow morning, it's all written and ready to go and everything. Instead, I am here with some incredibly sad news.


Remember when I posted about Cooper and his fight with cancer? He lost. This morning Cooper passed away. He was three. All day long I've wanted nothing more than to scoop up my own boys and hug them close. It is heartbreakingly sad. Babies shouldn't spend more time in the hospital than on the playground. And they shouldn't die.



I don't usually quote from books but I did mark this one passage from Paper Towns on page 33. It seems appropriate to talk about it here instead of in my review.

"But then the life spans started getting longer, and people started having more and more future, and so they spent more time thinking about it. About the future. And now life has become the future. Every moment of your life is lived for the future- you go to high school so you can go to college so you can get a good job so you can get a nice house so you can afford to send your kids to college so they can get a good job so they can get a nice house so they can afford to send their kids to college."

Isn't that true? I keep thinking, "soon, soon we'll be all settled. Money problems will finally level out, the house will be like I want it, I'll figure out how to work 40 hours and have a life." When is soon? How about NOW? Instead of waiting for life to be right, instead of making the future perfect, why aren't I thinking about now? About being with my boys without worrying about the laundry and the checkbook. I'm going to stop imaging how things will be "when the boys are older." We're going to have fun now. We're going to stop and smell the roses. We're going to enjoy each other without worrying about all the things we "should" be doing. Loving each other and each other's company is going to come first, and the house and the laundry is going to come later. Life is too short to waste. Sometimes impossibly short.




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14 comments:

  1. That is just so heart breakingly sad. Thank you for the reminder to hold our little ones a bit tighter.

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  2. That is such sad news. My oldest boy is three, and I can't imagine how hard it would be to lose him.

    You're right - we should enjoy every second we have with them.

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  3. Oh Lisa! My heart goes out to you and your family. This was such a touching post and I hope it is a message that will continue to move you through the good and the bad (I have horrible horrible stress and worry, but this year I've been really working hard at just being in the moment...it's hard but it does make a huge difference).

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  4. this is so sad. but he's in a better place without pain and suffering and that is a good thing.

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  5. You are so right. We should live our life in the now and not be so concerned with the future. I am going to give my boys extra snuggles. I will keep Cooper's family in my thoughts and prayers because I can not imagine the pain they are feeling.

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  6. That has to be absolutely devastating. I just can't imagine losing a child. It would be nice if we could all remember that this moment is all that matters. Yesterday is gone and tomorrow isn't promised.

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  7. I'm so so sorry to hear about Cooper. Parents should never have to face the death of their child. You are so right to live in the moment.

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  8. Thanks everyone. It's so very sad that its almost unbelievable. It sure does change your outlook on a lot of stuff though.

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  9. Oh no, I'm so sorry to hear this :(

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  10. Such a sad story. The passage you've quoted reminds me of the following:

    Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans. John Lennon, "Beautiful Boy"

    Having lost a child, I am a firm believer in living life to its fullest and cherishing those you love while they are still with you. Don't wait for tomorrow or those "somedays." They may never come.

    Thinking of you and your extended family.

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  11. This is the saddest news Lisa! My thoughts are with you and your family.

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  12. Oh no, how very, very sad. :( Very sorry for such a tragic loss. :(

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  13. Oh, that is just awful. Thanks for the reminder that every moment counts.

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  14. I am so sorry, Lisa. I have been behind on my blog reading and I am sorry I am just now getting to read this. My dad lost his fight with cancer in January and as hard as that is, knowing he had plans he still wanted to see through, it is agonizing to see a child go through this. It breaks my heart. Cancer does not discriminate based on age, unfortunately. I don't have children of my own, but I think that it is definitely important to cherish every moment you spend with them as a parent. My thoughts are with you and the boy's family.

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